Mr. Personal Space Bubble Invader

I'm imagining a rendition of the Bud Light "Real Men of Genius" song for this guy, but I'm far too tired/lazy at the moment to come up with the lyrics. Perhaps another time.

The IT guy for the other company that shares a building with my company chronically invades my personal space. Now, I consider myself a pretty laid-back individual... sometimes, I even border on touchy-feely... but I have my limits. Every time I hold a conversation with this dude, even in passing, he gets so close to me that I can see the outline of his contact lenses, and I can tell what flavor of artificial creamer he had in his morning cup of coffee. I do not appreciate this, especially in light of the fact that we have never actually been formally introduced. He is too loud, he touches me (and everyone else) too much, and he was totally hogging the copier on Friday (which is unrelated to his personal space invasion issues, but it's still annoying). Every time he comes near me, I get the strongest urge to run away screaming "BAD TOUCH! BAD TOUCH!"

Other (completely unrelated) ideas I've been toying with include:
*Getting a tattoo, but I'm not sure what or where, although I know I want to get it somewhere that won't stretch or sag too much.
*Piercing my eyebrow.
*Slapping a harness and leash on Louie, calling him my "seeing-eye cat," and carting him to work with me.
*Wearing one of those beer-hats at work all day with Cherry Coke cans in it. Mmm, Cherry Coke.

There are more, but I can't think of them off the top of my head. It's definitely time for bed (hey, that rhymed!). I'm cat-sitting my own cat at MKD and AsianPixie's place while they're out of town this weekend. Yay, kitty slumber party!